The 360 Woman Blog

Love and Armageddon

Mon, 23 Aug 2010 17:22:49 +0000

So I’m sitting at the stoplight yesterday, and I notice this Jeep in front of me. It’s a black, shiny, hardtop-looking Jeep, and it’s got a full-sized spare tire on the back with a shiny hubcap. In the middle of the hubcap is this really bulky looking, hard-core skull.

I’m like, “oh, that’s interesting.” I start kind of peeking around, and I see the same skull on all the hubcaps. I start looking closer and closer at this vehicle and this jeep is like, seriously fortified. It’s got guards and rails and all sorts of things. Everything is shiny and hard-core and spotless. I mean, this is the kind of car that is ready for Armageddon. Like they’re ready for the shit to hit the fan. Come on – bring it on!

So I’m thinking, I’ve got to see who is driving this car. I pull into the lane next to him and look over, and it’s a couple! It’s this young couple, you know, maybe in their early thirties, and they’re both really muscular and wearing white tank tops. They look like they could be in the Army or something. They’re just looking at each other and laughing and talking and beaming and they seemed so in love. And I thought, “Well, that’s just awesome.”

It really goes to say that there’s someone out there for everyone. These two are completely ready for Armageddon. They’re trained. They’re at the top of their game and they have someone to stand there with them. I was just so blown away by the beauty of that couple in their Armageddon-read- shiny-blacktop-skull-Jeep-kind-of-thing going down the road.

I just want to share with you guys: There’s someone out there for everyone.

Jessica Sabatini
THE 360 Woman
jessica@THE360Woman.com

Do We Get More Than One True Love?

Fri, 13 Aug 2010 21:31:28 +0000

Often when I tell people I do relationship coaching, they will ask, “So, can you help me find my one true love?”

Well, the truth is that I believe that there is not “one true love” out there for any of us. This is an abundant universe. There are many possible choices for a great match for you – for each one of us. So if you miss one opportunity, don’t worry. Another one is going to come along for you.

What I do is I help people get absolutely clear on what to look for in a partnership and a relationship that will truly enhance their life. Then I help them to recognize it. Often we get to where we understand what we want, but it’s hard to actually know when it’s being presented to us in the person sitting across the table.

In my personal journey, I spent many months interviewing happily married couples and people from failed marriages to find out what I needed to look for and get the clues: how do I know that this person is worth committing to, that we’re going to create a great life together, and all those things. I really had to figure out what I needed as me, Jessica, the unique person.

Eventually, I got really skilled at this. I gotta tell you, once you get this really clear in your head, you can be on a first date with someone and say, “Nope, not it,” or “Yes, this is it.” In fact, on my first date with my now-husband, it was completely clear by the end of the date that we would most likely get married and we’d have a wonderful life together and be very fulfilled.

The wild thing that happened was about two months later. A good friend called. He said, “You know, I think I’m ready to get married and settle down and have kids. I thought about you, and think that you and I would make a great couple and would really create a beautiful life together. I’m wondering if you’re interested.”

I thought about it for a moment. I thought about the criteria and everything that I had learned from my interviews – what to recognize and how to know what is a good match for me. I said to him, “You know, you’re right. We would make a great couple. I think you’re really on to something there. However, I’ve already met a guy I think is really going to be great for me as well and since he came first, I’m going to stick with him.”

My friend, of course, tried to talk me out of it, but I said, “No, really. I’m going to stay with this one.” He moved on, and within a year he found another woman he knew he could create this life with. They went off, got married, had children, and seem to be very happy today.

A month after that call, I was out listening to a band with some friends, and I met a guy, a friend of friends. We were talking and having a really great time. I learned more and more about him. At the end he said, “I’d love your number. I’d love to go out with you. Something’s here.”

I said, “I’d love to give you my number, and if I were single, and didn’t have this fantastic boyfriend, I would totally give you my number because you’re a great guy. I wish you all the best, and I hope that you move on to finding a really fabulous woman for yourself.” Of course, I did take his number (just in case).

But the point here is that once you gain the ability to get really clear and know exactly how to recognize who would be good for you, you begin to see multiple possibilities. It’s not just one true love out there. There are many. The universe wants to give you as many possibilities for joy and happiness as possible.

So get clear. Take that time to really know what you want. Believe it is possible, and start to see those qualities in those around you.

This is Jessica Sabatini, signing off.
www.The360Woman.com
May you have your pie, and eat it, too!

Separated Women; Is It Socially Acceptable for Them to Date?

Wed, 11 Aug 2010 18:16:25 +0000

Last week, I made a post about whether or not it was okay to date a recently separated guy. I’ve gotten a lot of messages, a lot of questions, and a lot of discussions from both men and women around this topic. In particular, a couple of women have asked me, “Is it socially acceptable for a recently separated woman to date?”

Well, the answer is: It depends.

First of all, it depends on how judgmental and what standards the society you hang out with has. But in general, it is completely understandable for a recently separated woman to go out, to have some fun, to get your ya-yas out, feel sexy, feel free, experiment with what it feels like again to present yourself to the world in that way. It may even help with some of your healing. It can definitely help with getting some clarity about what you like and what you don’t like as you’re moving forward and thinking about future relationships.

From my perspective, I would like you to keep in mind what you’re feeling, to really check in and be honest without yourself about what feelings are coming up as you’re dating. Are you feeling pressure? Anger? Insecurity? Angst? If the feelings are overwhelming, it might be a signal that it’s time to step back, to really go back to yourself and try to get clear about what’s going on inside of you.

Now, there are a few situations where it may not be socially acceptable for you to be dating if you’re recently separated. The first is if you’re rushing into some sort of long-term commitment or engagement. Maybe if this is someone you’ve been having an affair with for a while and it is decided in your society that your husband was wrong for you and this guy is right for you, then that can be understandable. But remember, you still are at a point where you haven’t quite sorted out what your feelings are. It takes some time for all of that to adjust.

So this might not be the best time for you to declare your undying love to the guy who mows your lawn and is half your age.

Another situation where it might not be socially acceptable for a recently separated woman to date is if you’re neglecting your kids. If you have kids and you’re going out five nights a week and saying, “This is for Mommy; Mommy has to feel free; Mommy has to do this,” and you’re not being there to support them with what they’re going through with the separation, then yes, society will probably judge you negatively about doing that.

Now, by all means, I am not saying that you have to go out and date if you have no desire. If you would rather stay at home, deal with the logistics, deal with your own healing, and get to know yourself better, that’s perfectly alright.

But if you do want to go out, have dinner with a guy, smile, and see what that feels like again, it’s okay. It might actually be good for you.

Let’s keep the discussion going. Any more questions, feel free to post here or email me at Jessica@the360woman.com

This is Jessica Sabatini with The 360 Woman
May you have your pie, and eat it, too.

Why Do You Want a Husband?

Sat, 07 Aug 2010 17:50:19 +0000

Sometimes you have to ask yourself: Why do you really want a husband?

Now, I hope it’s not to gain some sort of social status or for financial security. In this day and age, we know that a husband doesn’t necessarily give us those things, and that many of us women have proven that we can take care of ourselves, either through necessity or choice.

I could buy “children” or “partner in parenting;” that’s definitely one I could buy. But, I invite you to think about how it will truly make a difference in your life to have a husband there with you. The more clearly motivated you are, the easier it is to find your Mr. Right.

For me, it went something like this: it was a dark and lonely night when I decided it was time for me to find a life partner, AKA: a husband. And my main inspiration was that I really wanted someone to be there for me when I got sick. Now, I was very sick at this point in time and there was no one to help take care of me. I knew that that was not the way I wanted my life to be. There must be something better than that.

Today, I have to say that I love that when my body has totally given out and I am ill as can be, that there is this loving man to bring me water, to take my temperature, to rub my back, to feed the kids, to hold my hair as I puke into the toilet. You know, it’s so romantic. But really think about how having a man could make a difference in your life, and what is important to you about bringing that in.

Now, you may meet and date a guy who makes a lot of money and wears nice clothes, but you get this feeling that if you were to break your hip and need constant care, maybe even be in a wheelchair for a while, that this guy would probably resent every minute of caring for you. Then, he’s probably not worth your time or commitment.

So ask yourself: Why do I really want a husband? Really see what it looks like to have that kind of support in your life. And it’ll help you, as you’re navigating and looking at your different options, to decide who is not in the running and who you can really share a life with – who could truly enhance your life.

Need further help getting clear on what you really want? Email me anytime or check out Empowered Attraction.

Jessica Sabatini
The 360 Woman
jessica@the360woman.com

Last Chance to Save on Group Coaching!

Wed, 04 Aug 2010 19:43:23 +0000

**WARNING** This post is highly informational and promotional, but I have to tell you what’s going on!

August 10th is our next free call in the Sabatini Single Series. I will be sharing some powerful secrets about using the laws of the Universe to bring you a relationship that fuels your life.

On that call, I will be telling about an awesome discount for the upcoming Empowered Attraction Group Coaching Program! This is a ten week class over the phone that will help you find a lasting, loving relationship that actually enhances your life.

• Maybe it’s been a while since you’ve been on the dating scene, and the thought of getting out there is overwhelming.

• Maybe you’ve been shopping around for the right guy for a while, but are feeling stuck on a treadmill of unfulfilling relationships.

The truth is that relationships between men and women have changed quite a bit in the last 50 years. The old rules no longer apply.

Through the ten week EMPOWERED ATTRACTION program, I will provide you with immense support and guidance as you learn how to find and receive love that energizes and fuels all areas of your life.

All Classes are over the phone Tuesday evenings starting August 17th

As part of the Empowered Attraction program, you get:
• ten 75 minute group calls on empowered relationship stuff
• 3 one-on-one sessions with Jessica
• The Empowered Attraction Workbook
• Access to the Private page of downloads and recordings
• CD of dating advice and meditations

Regular Price : $897

But, listen to Tuesday’s call, and get the promotion code to save you hundreds!!!!

In order to qualify, you must be registered for the August 10th call,

How to Use the Law of Attraction to Bring You Mr. Right

DATE: Tuesday August 10, 2010

TIME: 9 pm Eastern, 6 pm Pacific

It’s time to step into your power and attract a relationship that makes your life wonderful!

Looking forward to “seeing” you on the call! And, as always, if you have any questions, you can contact me anytime at jessica@the360woman.com

Hot Wishes,
Jessica Sabatini
www.the360woman.com

Love Comes in All Shapes and Sizes

Mon, 02 Aug 2010 19:12:43 +0000

Recently, I was having lunch with a male colleague; fellow relationshipo guru. We wanted to know more about eachother’s services. About halfway through the conversation, he turns to me and asks, “So do you insist that your clients be a certain weight and attractiveness level?”

I was shocked! I said, “Of course not! Why on earth would I do that?”

His response was, “Well, you have to admit that the more attractive a woman is, the more likely she is to get a man.”

I would like to clear this up right here, right now:

What you look like has very little to do with your ability to experience a loving, lasting relationship. How you feel about yourself, as a whole, has a lot to do with your ability to be in a relationship of giving and receiving love.

Yes, I admit, that sexy lady in the short skirt with the big boobs will probably experience more dates than the average Plain Jane. But her looks do not make her any more eligible to find true love than any other woman out there. I know plenty of women who are fit and gorgeous and sexy and heart-breakingly single, and so frustrated and miserable about it.

And, I know plenty of women who may be a bit overweight and wouldn’t necessarily win a beauty contest, but are in these awesome relationships where they are giving love, they’re receiving love, there’s support, there’s encouragement, there’s just a beautiful life created out of these relationships.

If you don’t believe me, I challenge you to put this to the test: Go to some big chain grocery store like Harris Teeter or Kroger or Food Lion. Walk around and notice the couples in the store. They come in all shapes and sizes and colors. Notice that there are some really good looking women by themselves obviously shopping for one.

So do not use the excuse of “I’m not pretty enough to be on the cover of Vogue magazine” to think that you do not deserve a loving, lasting relationship! That’s not how it works.

I’d love to hear how you feel about this. Post a comment here or email me directly at Jessica@the360woman.com

Jessica Sabatini

Recently Separated Guy, Is It Okay to Date Him?

Sat, 31 Jul 2010 14:53:42 +0000

I had a girlfriend call me yesterday and ask me a question that I’m going to share with all of you. What she wanted to know was, “Is it ok to date a guy who was recently separated?”

So here is my take on that:

Yes, it is okay to date a guy who was recently separated. It could even be a lot of fun. However, there are a few things to keep in mind. One is maybe not having so many expectations on this relationship. It’s really okay if you’re just kind of looking to date and have fun, but he may not be ready for that kind of long-term commitment.

Keep in mind that you can’t really trust what he says. He doesn’t know his own feelings right now. It’s going to take some time for him to process what has happened, for him to get really clear on what he truly does want. So even if he’s saying two months after being separated from his wife, “Oh, you’re exactly what I want. This is exactly what I’m looking for,” he may not totally be aware of his own feelings. So you can’t really trust what he has to say either.

The other thing is, just be careful if you’re getting yourself into a sticky situation. Often with separations there might be kids, or financial things, all sorts of stuff that’s just simply not your problem. Be careful that you’re not taking on his issues with his own separation in the process. But other than that, it can be a lot of fun. So go out there, see if you find some recently separated men to tackle and start dating – No, I’m kidding. But good luck with that, and I hope it goes well.

If you’re looking for more in-depth relationship guidance, check out Empowered Attraction

Feel free to email me any time with questions
Jessica Sabatini
Jessica@the360woman.com

I’m Giving It Away!

Sat, 10 Jul 2010 16:59:35 +0000

I know, it’s insane, but I have decided to give away ONE spot in the next Empowered Attraction group coaching program. This is an awesome opportunity, but you have to act fast! (scroll to the bottom to find out how to qualify)

**WARNING** This post is highly informational and promotional, but I have to tell you what’s going on!

July 13th is our next free call in the Sabatini Single Series. I will be sharing some powerful secrets about being yourself and opening up without putting yourself out there to get hurt.

On that call, one lucky lady will win this spot in the Empowered Attraction Group Coaching Program! This is a ten week class over the phone that will help you find a lasting, loving relationship that actually enhances your life.

• Maybe it’s been a while since you’ve been on the dating scene, and the thought of getting out there is overwhelming.

• Maybe you’ve been shopping around for the right guy for a while, but are feeling stuck on a treadmill of unfulfilling relationships.

The truth is that relationships between men and women have changed quite a bit in the last 50 years. The old rules no longer apply.

Through the ten week EMPOWERED ATTRACTION program, I will provide you with immense support and guidance as you learn how to find and receive love that energizes and fuels all areas of your life.

All Classes are over the phone Tuesday evenings starting August 17th

Regular Price : $897

But, you could win your spot by doing the following…

In order to qualify, you must be registered for the July 13th call,

Being Authentic on a Date: How to Open Up
Without Hanging a Sign Saying “Hurt Me Here”

DATE: Tuesday, July 13th, 2010

TIME: 9 pm Eastern, 6 pm Pacific

You also need to fill out the following survey with your name (so I know you’re interested in qualifying) and be live on the call so you can squeal with delight.

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/TDLDTL7

It’s as easy as that. The lucky winner could be you!

It’s time to step into your power and attract a relationship that makes your life wonderful!

Looking forward to “seeing” you on the call! And, as always, if you have any questions, you can contact me anytime at jessica@the360woman.com

Hot Wishes,
Jessica Sabatini
www.the360woman.com

Sudoku and Hot Showers

Thu, 01 Jul 2010 18:16:01 +0000

I love the idea of attaching something productive with something you already do that you may feel some guilt around. I have a client who could never seem to make time to say these wonderful affirmations she had written. She also wanted to stop feeling guilty about taking insanely long showers.

So, she bought herself some bathtub crayons (you get them in the baby section) and began writing her affirmations on the shower wall while cleaning up for the day. She began to notice fantastic insights and ideas coming to her in the shower, and she had a great way of writing them down. Decorative, fun, and productive!

I have a recent example from my own life. My husband is taking a class on prayer and blessing. He comes home and tells me all about it, during which time I think about how there’s no way I can find a peaceful moment to squeeze something like prayer into my life. But, I do have a guilty pleasure of doing Sudoku whenever there is a quiet moment. I have books of them. (I’m also a big logic puzzle addict.)

So, I decided to assign a meaning to each number in the box. I get nine. I listed my business, my home, important people and communities, and so on. Now, when I am solving the puzzle, using the meaning of whatever number I’m working on, I say thanks and offer blessings to that particular aspect of my life. Not only am I finding a way to fit prayer into my life, I’m also cruising through the “Very Hard” puzzles with total ease and grace.

If you notice, in both of these examples, not only did we find a way to make time for positive intentions, we also found away to relieve guilt from indulging in a daily activity. Killing two birds with one stone. That’s what I call effective multitasking. Now it’s time to apply this to you.

Take a moment to think about what you know you need to make time for in your life: affirmations, prayer, gratitude, intention, visioning, breathing. Now, how can you attach that activity to something you already do every day? Something menial that you barely think about or that you feel guilty for indulging in?

Set up a reminder to get you started. It only takes three weeks of integrating activities to establish your new habit. Just think, you are less than a month away from having positive thinking being a natural part of your daily life.

Let me know how you multitask in your life. Email Jessica Sabatini from www.the360woman at jessica@the360woman.com

What Kind of Relationship Do You Want?

Wed, 16 Jun 2010 18:22:20 +0000

I’ve often heard that it’s a good idea to make a detailed description of what you are looking for in a partner. However, I’d like to suggest that you get clear on what you are looking for in a partnership not just the man. This can allow you to let go of the superficial details of a potential partner and move on to what is created when the two of you get together.

Before I found my husband, I had a list and a pretty good picture in mind of the kind of guy I wanted to be with for the rest of my life. I would meet and even date many guys who matched this description. But, the relationships never went anywhere (at least not anywhere I wanted to be), and I was left feeling unsatisfied and alone.

Then one day I decided to focus on the kind of relationship I really wanted versus the guy himself. Once I got a clear picture, I was able to pass up guys who made my heart beat fast, but were not interested in the relationship I had in mind. And, when the perfect fit did appear, I was able to identify him and say “Yes” when he asked me to grab some coffee.

You can have a lasting partnership where you feel free to be yourself, or you can have a few wild nights filled with passion, presents, or whatever you think you want in a relationship. Just remember that it is a relationship between two people, and that finding a person who meets a list of criteria is not a guarantee that the relationship you want will follow.

As the old saying goes, be careful what you ask for because you just might get it. So, take a moment and put some thought into what you really want in an ideal relationship, not just the man.

Want more insight to using the Universe to bring you real love? Check out Empowered Attraction.

Another useful tidbit from Jessica Sabatini and The 360 Woman
Feel free to contact Jessica any time at jessica@the360woman.com